Hello friends,
Can you believe it's June! Totally unbelievable that the first stage of NETS is almost over, with about three weeks left. After the end of stage one there is a two week break, in which I am looking forward to resting here in England (probably checking out Oxford and some other historical areas).
This is an update on my walk with God, as I am here to receive and learn to extend healing prayer, and I can honestly say that God is very good and that he is faithful and will heal us if we let him. While I have been here God has really brought up a tendency I have to hide myself from the people around me, mostly because I felt inadequate or socially awkward. I think that this issue was central in my life and determined much of what I did, including hiding in books and television shows and choosing to do things for God (Martha) and not being with him (Mary). Since I have been here he has really been calling me to lay down trying to do things for him; things like fix myself for him, lead worship, stay busy, try to help others without really letting Him do his work in their lives - anything that would make me look good on the surface but not create a need to look deeper. This had been an issue that I had been wanting dealt with for a long time, and God decided to deal with it here, and over the process of the few months I have been here it has really been to feel accepted by him and by newfound friends. But in order to allow for that acceptance I needed to lay down the attempts to fix myself and surrender over to God what I'm doing for him (funnily enough) and just let myself receive for a little while without feeling guilty about it. This receiving has been from God and from people, for regardless of common thought God did not only create us with a God shaped hole that only he can fill, though that is very much there, he also created us with a people shaped hole - he created us to be in fellowship with each other and that is a truth that I still need to really sink in as I allow people into my life in a deeper way then I've ever done before when I chose to say that God was all I REALLY needed and dependancy on people means I'm inadequate.
In a nut shell that has been the major work of God in my life, he is a good and faithful God who will not let us stay lonely or isolated if we honestly and openly cry out to him for help and guidance, he came through for me and is changing my outlook, my heart, and my whole life. He is beautiful, he is faithful and I am more in love with him then ever!
Katherina Buyer <><
